Am I Okay?

I can't feel anything. Lost and alone and I didn't think about it. It's been almost a year and for the first time, I feel like I've shared in a moment of your life. For just a moment, it wasn't painful and I smiled a bit. I don't want to mess this up. I don't want you to run away. I'm scared, I'm really scared and everything is up in the air. For once, it didn't suck to be here on this earth. For a moment, my heart raced and it was nice to have my friend back. Please don't let this be the last time.

A Passing Glance

I didn't expect kindness in your voice but I know it was because you were at work. I didn't think you would be there so I told them 'We should go there' thinking there wouldn't be a chance. I wanted to see you but I couldn't even lift my face to see your eyes. I wish you would text me, I wish you'd say something. If today is any indication of the rest of the year, I'm gonna be stressed, busy and still in love with you. I had forgotten that you told me we could be friends. At the time, I told you no because I didn't understand. I wasn't understanding. Now it's too late but god, I'd do anything just to be something to you again.